Tuesday, February, 07,2023

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LEARN TO TALK WITH YOURSELF

A human brain is a unique machine which can think endlessly and talk with itself on so many subjects including bizarre and familiar. The mind which is like cloud storage in a digital device and is beyond scope of any definition, can talk with itself or rather itself talks continuously. This self-talk can be positive or negative. A positive internal dialogue makes a person feel good about self and situations while negative self-talk is a product of intense anxiety, lack of confidence and self-belief. Thinking is easy and spontaneous but positive thinking needs training as well as guidance. A person capable of positive self-talk can think optimistically to get motivated. As a result of this optimism, it becomes easier to tide over the crisis and find a better solution even if the situation or problem is beyond total resolution. This way, our thinking becomes introspection and contemplation. Introspection may bring out our strength to cope with adversity and helps in finding a solution. This internal dialogue is a natural cognitive process which helps in improving mental health, work performance and relationships. Very recent studies and observations by alert clinicians have shown that people who had positive selftalk fared better on the ground of anxiety and death during Covid 19 pandemic. There were lesser incidents of obsessive-compulsive behaviour regarding extreme hygiene of hands and mouth. The positive selftalk helped them cope better than others as far as emotional storms were concerned. As per a school study, the students who had a habit of selftalk did better in school debate and speech competitions as it boosted their morale.

A 2022 study concluded that athletes who were talking with themselves gave a superior and consistent performance on the ground and even enjoyed the tremendous stress they underwent. One more thing that came to light was that the athletes who used words like you or their first name as a second person to talk showed improved and steady progress than the group which used the word I as a second person. This indicates that an egoistic attitude is a hindrance to improvement and upgrade. Then there is a huge group of people perpetually involved in negative self-talk. This is, in fact, an almost total majority in many groups of human societies. Their behaviour of negative selftalk is detrimental to self-esteem and self-worth. They always underestimate their capabilities. This leads to self-fulfilling prophecies of doom and a vicious cycle of negativism. In their talk with themselves, they repeat again and again that they won’t succeed, and that things are beyond their control. This behaviour puts them at a disadvantage as they won’t put their full effort to achieve a goal or change a situation. Because of this temperament, they won’t succeed but conclude that I already told you, I already knew" This self-inflicted failure may push them towards depression and anxiety. The whole situation can be changed by proper training by an experienced mentor or behaviour therapist with a philosophical inclination. As a negative attitude is a habit so it can be changed. A difficult situation can be taken as a challenge rather than an obstacle. I can’t do situation can be perceived as an opportunity to prove one's worth. We all mess up life at one point or another. A positive talk is capable of converting messed up incidents as part of experience and learning. One may fail but the potential to succeed hasn’t been lost by this single failure if one is ready to try again. Life might be miserable but always remember that it could have been in the worst situation. People may dislike but you need not worry till you love and like yourself. Self-love has no baggage and conditions. Learn to love yourself. You might not be knowing a lot of things but everything is fine if you want to know and put your best efforts in that direction. We all succumb to negativity off and on but if it becomes a dominant behaviour pattern, you need help and should seek it at the earliest without any hesitation.

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